And the Cat Came Back!

So as you know a week ago I had a plan.  It was not a plan I was in favour of, but a plan that I thought needed to happen.  I spent Jan 11, 2015 loving up Syd, telling her how much she meant to me, the impact she had on my life and frankly bawling my eyes out.  That night I made couch cushion bed on the floor of the kitchen and slept beside her.  What  pair we made- she was too weak to move and I was too uncomfortable to sleep.  I could have slept elsewhere but we had spent pretty much every night for the last 18 years together and I did not want her to be alone on her last night on earth.

At one point in time she commando crawled over to the cushion and snuggled with me, but my fits of sobbing and frequent nose blowing irritated her, so she moved back to her restful spot in front of the register.

Bill and Syd canoodling during healthy times

Around 3:30 am I looked over to see Bill curled up with Syd.  It brought a smile to my face and more
tears to my eyes.  I was so grateful that they had a chance to say good-bye.

As each hour passed I was more sure of my decision.  To keep her alive would only be for me, she was obviously in pain.  I awoke at 6:30 am to find Syd missing......

What the HELL!  Where could she have gone? An hour ago she could barely move.  Did she disintegrate or find a portal of some kind?  I searched high and low and finally found her in the basement.  Not only had she walked, she did stairs.

My resolution to follow through with the plan started to wane.  Was this the right decision?  I had two hours before I could phone the vet.  Two hours of waffling back and forth, making pro and con lists in my head-  "Do I or don't I?"

I was able to secure a 10:15 appointment.  My To Do List looked something like this:

• Phone crematorium.
• Go to vet.
• Get the deed done.
• Complete paper work.
• Go home and bawl.
• Pull self together.
• Go to work.

I managed to get the first two items completed.  That is when the vet said these words "Why would you put her down?  Her heart is good.  She is eating.  She is drinking and she is voiding. I can't see any reason to put her down now."  He also reported that he palpated a mass on her kidney or spleen but that could be something minor.  

Syd at the height of weakness

This was the reaction in my head-

"PARDON!!!!!!  This was not in the plan!  I agonized over the plan.  I tortured myself coming up with the plan.  The plan has been set in motion and now you are telling me that she is okay!  Inconceivable!"

The plan was then quickly modified to the following:

• Blood work
• Home with the cat.
• Shake head
• Wait.
• Wait some more.
• Shake my head some more.
• Call the vet.
• Confirmation that the main issue was low potassium.
• Return to vet for potassium supplements and new Senior food.
• Go to work.

Monty Python's "Bring Out Your Dead" was all I could think about as I waited to hear back from the vet..... "But I'm not dead yet!"  "Honestly I am feeling much better!!!".

Each day, post-vet, Syd has become a little stronger, a little brighter and a whole lot bossier.  The Vet Tech reported Siamese cats tend to be very resilient.  Syd is living proof!

Up and misbehavin' by the end of the week.

The Magic Number is...... 137!

Over the last 19 days, when I have not been playing nursemaid to Syd, I have been anxiously awaiting my daily challenge pick.  It is not that I am eager to complete a new challenge, I'm just excited by the possibility that I will pick a certain challenge-  "Get a puppy!!!!!".

In November, I put a down payment on a Golden Retriever puppy.  The breeder said that if the timing did not work-out for the first litter, my pick would move to the next litter, and so on and so on, until I was finally ready to get an additional dog.  My Mom and I have been joking that I have a dog on lay-away.

When I came up with the 365 Daily Challenge I decided I would throw "Get a puppy!" in as one of the challenges.   I would let "Jar of Possibilities" determine when I would get the new puppy.  All I knew was I would have a dog by the end of 2015.

Yep!  Fully prepared to leave it all up to fate.  That was until I got home today and found this post on Facebook.

Picture courtesy of Golden Pride Kennels on Facebook

Eeeeeeeeeekkkkkkkkk!  The puppies have arrived and I have not randomly picked the get a puppy card!!!!!!!

Did you see how cute they are... okay it is just their tail ends, but if their tail ends are that cute just imagine what the other end is going to look like..... ADORRRRABBBLE!!!

Desperation set in! What if I don't select "Get a Puppy"????? What if I have to wait a full year????  This just can not be!!!!!

This is what 137 challenges looks like.

Solution-  Pick 5 random challenge card and if pick a puppy was one of the 5,  it was a sign that I was to get a puppy from this litter.

5 cards picked.  No puppy!

Okay best two out of three..... everyone knows you have to do best two out of three!

No cigar!

It took 137 random pulls to find the puppy card.


ONE HUNDRED AND THIRTY-SEVEN!

This challenge is rigged!!!!!!

I am outraged!!!!!!!!

Seriously how could it take that many pulls to end up with "Get a puppy".

The Elusive Challenge

Now that I have found it, the question is what do I do with it.  I can't use if for tomorrow as I already selected that one-  "Wear my hair and make-up in a different way".

Do I throw it back into the pile, mix them up and let fate take it's course?

Do I help fate along by marking it with highlighter making it slightly easier to find?

Or do I give fate the big fungoli and become my master of my own destiny and get one of the puppies from this litter?

I could also say-  "Just kidding!" and substitute the puppy challenge with a new challenge.

Oh the options.  What to do, what to do??????

I guess I don't have to decide tonight.  I'll sleep on it and hopefully my choice will be clear tomorrow.

Smiling On The Inside- The Outside Is Too Weepy To Participate.

So the challenge for today was to smile.  Last night when I drew it out of the jar I thought "Easy peasy!"  Having the Seahawks win their game against the Panthers, making it through to the NFC Championship game next weekend, seemed to solidify that a perma-grin would be plastered on my face today.  

Well the universe had other plans in store.  Is being able to smile a challenge?????

HELL NO!!!!

Anyone can smile!  Try smiling when your insides are breaking into a bazillion little pieces.  Not so easy.  

When I moved out on my own, I decided to move to a city where I knew no one.  I was young and wanted an exciting change.  It did not take long to discover that I do better with a support network.  Unfortunately my network was miles and miles away.  New job, new town, no friends, shyness= loneliness.  I wanted to adopt a dog, but my landlord informed me dogs were forboden.   However, I could have a cat if I wanted.  Problem solved- cat adopted.

Gidge and Syd- The Early Years

Gidget provided the companionship that I sought and also gave me a reason to leave work at work and head home each night.  Things were going great until she decided to show her "love" via fangs and claws.  I had to wear long sleeves, even in the heat of the summer, as my arms looked like I kanoodled with Freddie Krugger every night.

Three months later, I could no longer take Gidget's loving affection.... I needed to do something and something fast.  I was desperate, but I had a plan.....  I would adopt another cat.  That is when Syd entered the picture.  Syd was Gidge's polar opposite... dainty, loving and more interested in fetching toys- than ripping my arms to shreds.

The plan worked.... Gidge transferred all her aggressive tendencies to Syd and I found myself with two cats to love.  Even better, Syd did not like people and would hide whenever anyone came over, so for all others knew I only had one cat.

Over the last 18 years Syd has taught me many things....

Sage Syd... The Purveyor of Life Lessons

• How to speak cat-  "Mrrrow?"- means "Where are you?  OR I'm not happy." and Meemrrow means "Hey there you are!!!!  It has been too long.... let's catch-up.  Everything is going to be alright.".  
• Effective evasive measures to use when scared-  hide under the covers... or in the drop ceiling or on the top shelf of the closet.... no one will look for, nor find you there.  
• That a cat's life can be stressful and can result in multiple stomach ulcers and irritable bowel syndrome.  It has to be taxing on the system trying to decide which sun beam to sleep in and to handle the antics of other furry herd members.  
• It is possible to "loosen-up" with age-  over the last four years she has started visiting vs hiding when others enter the house.
• One can hold onto their hopes and dreams until their dying days, even if they don't come true.  I am positive that Syd's main goal in life is to be an only pet.  Unfortunately I keep adding to the furry herd as members cross the Rainbow Bridge.  
• Sunbeams can make everything that is wrong in the world, right again!
• She taught me patience.... patience when nursing her thorough her many illnesses and patience when dealing with her "talking times".  She also demonstrated extreme patience when Gidge, in a fit of "eye whisker envy" would throw Syd in a head lock and proceed to rip out her upper whiskers from the root.  Through it all Syd was patient... demonstrating that even in unpleasant times, if one is patient, good times and upper whiskers will return. 

There have been countless other lessons over the years, but to list them all would bore you and tax your patience so I will end my tribute here.

As you have probably deduced, Syd has given me her sign.  Her sign that she is ready to tap out of life.  This morning she started having difficulty walking and standing.  She has taken up residence in front of the hot air register and can not move more that a couple inches in either direction.  She can not even manage to stand to eat or drink.

Tomorrow I will be saying my final farewell.  Tomorrow will mark the end of a friendship that has spanned close to half my life.  This is the part about having pets that really blows dead bears..... saying good-bye.

I hold on to the fact that she gave me 18 amazing years of love and acceptance... more than any of other furry herd members.  Maybe she held on so long

because she has as hard of a time saying goodbye as I do, or maybe she just plain stubborn... wanting to be the last pet standing.  Either way my heart is breaking and my gratefulness cup runneth over and is currently cascading down my face and out of my nose.  Off to pull myself together and to spend our last treasured moments together.

Farewell Syd!

Syd-  July 1996- Jan 12, 2015   To be determined at a later date!

Aged Heifer Cleans Up At the Fair

The Corporate Fitness Challenge ended in the middle of Dec, 2014 with a bang, some delicious bean dip and a to die for chocolate beet cake (don't scoff... it was yum!).  That was the day that all our hard work was measured and weighed.  As you may recall from the Pointenstein post in November my driving force for working out and clean eating was to not to finish first, it was not to finish last.... did I meet my goal?

In grand total I lost 10 inches and 12 pounds within the 6 weeks.  I am sure the weight loss was from all that mental math I was doing-  crunching numbers while others worked their abs.  All that clean eating, drinking water and increasing my physical activity also resulted in my receiving the highest points ribbon.

Oops.... Overshot that one a little bit!

When I saw the rosette, I had mental flash to the award shelf in my parents home.  A shelf brimming with similar styled rosettes, trophies  and the pictures of my parents with their prize winning 4-H/FFA steers, heifers and cows.  As the rosette was pinned on, I could not help but think-  I need a halter to really show this thing off.  One rosette would have sufficed, but my team won the challenge, so add other rosette and a tiara and I went from feeling like a winner to feeling like the Grand Champion at the fair.

So much for aiming for the middle of the pack.  I obviously need a remedial class in mental math!  Either that or I can just beat it out of my head.

The Corporate Challenge went from being something that I wanted to avoid like plague to being one of the best decisions that I have made in the recent past.  Not only did it re-kick my dedication to improving my health, it showed me that putting in the effort yields results.  The other benefit, that far out-weighs the obvious health improvements, is it has created this great support network at work.  We all made gains, we all survived the Challenge and we continue to motivate each other to be the best version of ourselves.  It has also resulted in the very cheap woman buying a gym membership.

Insert trumpet fan-fare here!  Seriously this is epic- kinda like the parting of the Red Sea. If it was a Jeopardy clue the answer would be "What is a thing you thought would never happen?"

The last time I sprang for gym membership was in university and it was never used.  I refuse to repeat that pattern!  I have already been twice this week.  Bonus- I actually know some of the members and was able to reconnect with colleague from my past.... shout out to Darla!  Looking forward to building more muscles, stamina and stretching my mental perseverance.  

Cheers to an active year and Congratulations Ladies of the Challenge.... We Are Superstars!

So Cold... But Too Stubborn to Do Something About It.

In the house getting ready to blog... so cold!

So the challenge for today was to try and reduce my carbon footprint.  I laughed when I saw it last night because I had already committed to going to the gym.  The gym is 3.5 km away.  Car pooling was out of the question, given I did not know anyone else going.  Public transit was considered for a millisecond, but then I remembered there is an hour wait for buses on the weekend and I did not want the hassle of figuring out which bus I needed to take and where I needed to catch it.  So the decision was made for me-  I hoofed it to and from the gym.

Mother Nature decided to test my resolve. I awoke to a snow squall warning and unploughed sidewalks that were littered not only with freshly fallen snow, but with the snow the careened over the banks from the street plows.  Just a little something special to help me warm-up before going to Blast and then the Centergy class.

A better section of sidewalk

Sections of the sidewalk were passable on the way home, but a majority of the route was socked in with snow.  I slipped and slided my way down the hill and made it home.... where I devoured a bowl of borscht... double sour cream and a 1/4 of a steaming hot apple pie.  4 hours of working out can really increase an appetite.

Walking was just part of my plan.... other efforts to reduce my carbon footprint today, included:

• Limited use of lights.
• Charging all electronics during non-peak hours, the night before.
• Unplugging all unnecessary items.
• No TV. 
• Creating minimal garbage.
• Reusing paper and recycling.
• Limited use of the stove and oven.
• Waiting to ensure a large load of dishes before filling the sink.
• Letting the "yellow" mellow.
• Using lukewarm water to was my hands and shower
• Keeping the heat at 18 degrees Celsius.... even though I am very, very chilled.  

I am glad to report the use of two hats, an extra layer of fleece clothing and flip-top mitts has helped warm me up.  In addition to drinking some hot tea and using my new electric hand warmer-  which is currently residing in my bra to warm my chestial region.

Oh the things I do in the name of change.

Other challenges to report on:

I have decided how I am going to stretch the $20.  Did you know that you can get 36 granola bars, one box of Smarties and 16 juice boxes for under $20.  I didn't either until yesterday.  But that is not how I stretched my $20.  After much consideration I have come to the conclusion that my mother is right!  That odd sound that you hear right now is my Mother doing a victory dance to that classic tune, known and sung by all mothers, called "I told you so!".   

The thing is I really, really, really want to be successful at this challenge so I thought and thought and the light bulb clicked on-  it is all in the interpretation of stretching.  Stretch could mean spending but it can also mean growing.  Viola!  I will invest it tomorrow when I meet with my banker.  Another challenge complete.

The challenge for Day 3 was to book a trip to take a future date.  I did not have any hesitation about what trip I would be booking but the taking part required some planning of when I could go.  The trip will be to Killarney Park where I will solo back-pack "The Crack" and back.  Four days of physical challenges and working on my mental perseverance..... I am excited!!!!!!! ( I will limit the number of exclamation points because in my exuberance to demonstrate my excitement I am more than likely to fill a whole page with them.)  I can't believe it-  Jan 3 and I have already booked a hunk of my 2015 vacation.  

Here is a sampling of some of the hiking I will be doing this summer.

Oh the climbing

But the views will be worth it.

Bonus tip of the day-  

When blogging by candle light and drinking tea, I highly suggest making sure your tea is the container that closest to you.  There was a near miss incident with the candle.  Thank goodness I noticed before I started pouring hot wax into my mouth.... but just think of how interesting the next blog would have been.  Missed opportunities to showcase my klutziness.

Cinderella, Cinderella!

Cinderella had a shoe-  I a mitt!

I did it again... I let my imagination and my need to star in my own romantic comedy get the best of me.   Picture it... New Year's Eve.  I head to the store in search of the last ingredients that I needed to make my Challenge meal for the next day.  I walk the aisles and get through the till with amazing speed.

I feel lucky.  Blessed even!

I head to the vehicle.  That is when I notice the pocket that contained my brand new mitts felt  suspiciously lighter than it had at the beginning of the shopping trip.  I reach into the pocket only to confirm that was two is now one.

I head back to the store, scanning the parking lot for my missing mitt.  No mitt.  I head directly to Customer Service only to be told that nothing had been turned in.   Drat!

I decided to conduct my own search and rescue mission, as I refused to get only one use out of a $45 pair of mitts.  As I start the search, my mind possibly fuelled by "Time After Time" playing on the loudspeakers- starts creating a positively Cinderellaesque meet-cute scene from a romantic comedy.

I would find my mitt in the basket of a mysterious man with chiseled features. Curious- he looks an awful like Gerard Butler.  I would thank him for rescuing my mitt.  He would insist I try it on... you know just to make sure that it fit and I was the rightful owner.  Was that a delightful Scottish accent I heard?

Our eyes would lock and we would just know we were meant to be.  He would ask me what my plans were for the night.  He would tell me to cancel them as I now have plans with him.  Dot.... dot..... DOT!

Flash forward a year and we are sipping a non-alcoholic beverage in the exact same spot where we first met, toasting to a great year.  He drops something.... bends down to pick it up.  Now he is on one knee and that is when I spy the box-

OMG!

He proposes.... I say yes.  My eyes fill with tears of joy.... he rises, we embrace... music plays and the scene fades to darkness.

Just writing it out I am in bliss!   Sigh!!!!

Any version of the above would have been better than what happened.

I searched the store.  Buttkiss.  No mitt.... no handsome stranger... nary an accent to be heard.

I ask at Customer Service again, only to be told-  NO!

I walked into the bitter wind, one hand freezing to drive home to face the dawning of a new year alone.

Someday my meet cute will happen.... I continue to

hold out hope.

PS.  The wayward mitt was turned in Friday morning.  I did a dance of joy-  didn't even care about the stares from the other patrons.

Reunited!!!!!!

The Apple Doesn't Fall Far From the Tree.....

When my Mom heard about my plan to create a list of challenges to complete for the year, she wanted in on it.  She started making her own list, but gave up.  See her list was a long laundry list of have to-do's.  The longer the list grew the more overwhelmed she became.  I explained that although have to-do's could be part of the list,  she needed to have some simple, fun and inspiring challenges,  or there was no hope that she would follow through.  She opted to follow my list instead and waits each night for me to draw a challenge for us both to do the next day.

This agreement has confirmed something that my siblings and I have known for a long time... my mom is the "Mother" of control junkies.

Mom- "You should take pictures of the challenges!"
Me-  "I plan to Mom."
Mom- "Each day you need to write down what you did as part of the challenge and a little about what happened."
Me- "Already thought of that Mom!  I plan on blogging about it."
Mom-  "Oh!"

She decided to opt out for Day One-  Make a New Meal.  As I periodically phoned her to keep her abreast of my progress, she commented that she was glad she decided to skip it.  Completing hte new meal challenge would mean she would be in the kitchen all day and that was NOT how she wanted to spend her day.

Yesterday afternoon I drew out the challenge for Day 2-  See how far you can stretch $20.

Mom- "What?  $20 is not that much!"
Me-  "That is kinda the point... you know to challenge yourself."
Mom- "Still you can't get a lot with $20."

Mom- "Remember to write down what you bought with your $20!!!!"

It is now Day 2 and I am proud to say that I have not spent my $20.  I wanted to, but knowing I am accountable for documenting what I did with the $20 I looked at would-be purchases differently today.  There are things that I need to get but they all cost more than $20.  So I am holding off until I can come up with a plan to maximize what I did buy with the $20.  Let's see how long I can go!

More interesting will be what my Mom does with her $20.

Accidental Poisioning or Google Induced Hysteria

So the New Year brought with it a challenge to make a meal that I had never made before.  Being an overachiever, I decided to to double up my effort and tried four new recipes, one for lunch and the rest of supper.  This seemed like an excellent plan until I realized that I also had stewing beef and cabbage that needed to be used pronto.  This meant I also had to make my borscht yesterday as well.

So Jan 1, 2015 started with the entire day spent in the kitchen cooking and doing dishes.... and doing more dishes.  And did I mention dishes?  

The stuffed baked sweet potato was excellent, but I felt I did not really get to enjoy it, as I had started on the borscht prior to sitting down. This meant I could not spend as much time as I would have liked savouring the potato.

I had soup to make!  

Half-way through the borshct making I realized that the pork tenderloin was in the freezer and would need to de-thaw.

Crap!

I also realized that the pork and the fennel induced potatoes au gratin needed to cook at different temperatures.

Double Crap!

Tenderloin removed from the freezer to de-thaw in the fridge. 

Potatoes au gratin started and cooking.  The plan being I would pop the pre-cooked potatoes back in the oven at the tail end of cooking the pork roast to warm-up.

The borscht was completed while the potatoes cooked.  I canned it and put it in the freezer to eat at another time.    By this time I was knackered and decided to have snacks-  hummus with chips and the Chocolate Goddess Mousse with Pomegranate made the day before.  Sorry no pictures.... to yummy... time spent eating vs photographing this particular food item.

That is when I looked a the time..... if I wanted to have supper at a decent hour I needed to get started on the stuffing and the roast.  The only problem.... the roast was still frozen solid.

No problem.... no problem.... don't panic.  It might thaw faster in a cold water bath.  It isn't that big.

As the roast lounged in it's cold water spa;  I prepared the stuffing.  The stuffing was done... but the roast wasn't.  

Staring at it did not help.  Praying did not help.  Running another cold bath for it did not help.  I just had to be patient.  

I was patient for about 30 minutes.... then I was all "Screw patience!  I am a woman of action!!!!!  I am not going to let a little hunk of frozen meat get between me and supper!!!!!!!"  

So I stuffed the pork.... frozen bits and all and nestled it into the roasting pan ready to being the cooking process.  The recipe said to cook it for 1 and a quarter hours or until the internal temperature was 145 degrees.    I followed the recipe, in fact when I measured the temperature it was over 155 degrees in the middle of the roast.   

Ahhhh!  I forgot to put the potatoes in to re-heat!  

NUTS!!!

Okay-  the roast has to "rest" (because sitting in a hot oven I guess is overly taxing to roasts) for 15 minutes.  There you go-  put the potatoes in to warm while the roast is resting.  

15 minutes later-

I cut the roast up.  Just a second, the meat is looking a little pink?  Should it be pink?  Is it like chicken and pink is bad?  

No, no, no.... the meat thermometer said it was done.  It is fine...... fingers crossed.

I start eating.   Part way through the meal my stomach starts feeling queasy.  The following thoughts start running through my head-

• "I didn't just give myself food poisoning did I?"
• "You ate pink meat. Why did you eat pink meat?"
• "What are the symptoms of pork food poisoning? How soon until I know whether I poisoned myself?"
• "Goggle!"
• "Where the hell is the iPad???????"
• "Okay Goggling...... blah, blah, blah........ ROUND WORMS!!!!!!... What the freakin' hell!  Did my stomach just do a flip?"
• "Symptoms are getting worse.  Is it poisoning or is it the thought of round worms?"
• "Christ I feel like I need to puke.  No puking will just confirm that you now have round worms.... suck-it up!"
• "Great idea!  Make a new meal!  Way to start this challenge bonehead... poison yourself..... round worms-  urrrgghhh tummy not well." 

For the next three hours I lay prostrate on the couch, sipping peppermint tea, fluctuating between being convinced I had poisoned myself and trying to convince myself that I had just overeaten and that was why my stomach was upset.  As the minutes past to hours, I braced myself for the possibility of more surprises- such as projectile vomiting and explosive diarrhea.  Oh the fun I had in store for myself.  

Neither came. It seems my nauseous state was all a figment of my imagination fueled by hysteria over contracting roundworms and a deep seated fear of pinkish meat.  Sadly, I don't think I will ever be able to enjoy this variation of a meal again... and I have all these left overs!

Did I mention that one of the challenges this year is to host a dinner party........ 

Dinner anyone?

Holy Control-top Pantyhose.... Batman!

My original intent for starting this blog was to be accountable  for and document my attempt to improve my overall physical health.   However, the more posts I create the more I realize my physical health is only part of the equation.  The bigger battle is improving my mental health.  What is the point in having an appropriate BMI and fat to muscle ratio if you can't handle the curves of life..... that is like putting high performance tires on a tinker toy.

Pointless!

I have a dream.... in this dream I am a carefree,  bohemian woman.  A woman to takes surprises by the balls and transforms them into amazing adventures that others ohh and ahh over.  There is only one itsy bitsy road block to my realizing this dream-  I do not like surprises.  Sure, I love the thought of being surprised, but more time than not surprises, big or small,  fill me with angst.   As soon as these little "curves" occur I switch into desperate micro-management mode trying to mitigate the damages and regain control over the situation.  I actively take measures to reduce and eliminate the possibility of surprises.  Structured routines, rules and to-do-lists are like the warm fuzzy lounge pants of my life.  They make my day tolerable and keep my angst levels to a dull roar.  The only problem is when these tools fail.... I feel like I have failed and my frustration, in my abilities and with life, grows.

I thought I was happy.... until I realized I wasn't.

Contemplating my "To- Do-List"

Progressively over 2014 I found myself randomly saying "I'm tired.".  Sometimes it was just a thought, sometimes I would blurt it out loud in the middle of an activity.  When it first happened I took it at face value-  I must be tired and need a break.  But one day, when this thought overtook me, I happened to do a quick body scan.

I did not feel mentally tired....

I did not feel the bone weary tiredness that comes with physical effort.

Curious.....

What could this all be about.  If I was not tired why was my mouth randomly blurting out, in Tourette's fashion.  This pattern continued and increased in frequency until I realized that my body and brain were trying to tell me something that my conscience was desperately trying to deny!

I am in a rut... a trench of my own making if you please.  My endless routines, rules and rituals have been successful in  protecting me from the surprises but they have become a buzz kill and are slowly sucking the joy out of my life.

The big question was what to do about.

Luckily a book I read this summer seemed to have the answer.  The book was called "Picked the Wrong Guy.  Gave Him the Wrong Finger."  I had bought it because the title made me laugh out loud in the store.  The premise of the story is the main character encountered a major curve ball in her life and spent the next 10 years building a protective cocoon around herself.  When she finally realized she was in a rut, her BBF was more than excited to help create a set of challenges help her give up the need to control everything.

The making of the Jar

The more I thought about it, the more this type of shake up seemed to be the answer.  Introduce small daily surprises into my routine with the hopes that these changes will have a ripple effect and lead to bigger life changes.

It can't hurt right!

Nothing ventured.... nothing gained.

On my birthday I decided I was 100% invested in committing to this project.  Change..... that would my gift to myself.  Over the last few days of December I brainstormed, with the help of my Facebook peeps, re small doable changes that I will do each day.

Jar of Possibilities

To minimize my need to control,  the next daily challenge will be  randomly selected from the Jar of Possibilities the night before the challenge is to occur.  I will complete the challenge the next day or in the case of some of the multi-day challenges, as soon as possible.  This will mean re-tooling, juggling and chaos.  All words that make my heart flutter and panic rise.

2015 is going to be a growth year..... I can't wait.







My first challenge-

Tomorrow's menu:

• Baked Stuffed Sweet Potatoes.
• Pork Tenderloin with Butternut and Fontina stuffing
• Fennel Infused Potato's Gratin
• Chocolate Goddess Mousse with Pomegranate