Oops I Did it Again- The Golden Version

I have a weakness… neigh an obsession and that obsession is with dogs.  As I have most likely mentioned this fixation goes back many, many years.  One of my earliest memories  is trying to convince my parents to allow me to have a dog when I was three.  My attempts were thwarted, but that Christmas I did get my companion for life…. Puff the Wonder Mutt.  

Puff masquerades as a mere stuffed animal but in actual fact he is a magical beast that has done a great job guarding me during sleep for the last 49 years.  See I am often plagued with nightmares and have been since a young age.  I lost track of how many times I woke up in the middle of the night in a cold sweat from a dream where someone broke into the house and murdered my family.  I would lie in bed frantic, wondering if the intruder was still in the house and if it was real or only a dream.  Eventually I would hear my sister breathing in the bed beside mine and I would know that at least she survived…. But how did everyone else fare?

I would slide out bed, gripping Puff and would slowly and stealthy make my way up the stairs carefully avoiding the sections of the stairs and floor that creaked, just on the off chance that someone was still in the house.  I would make my way from room to room to find out who made it and who perished.   

Room 1- Brother is still alive…. A good sign,

Room 2- Younger sister still alive…. Okay all the kids survived

Now the last room…. What if my parents didn’t make it???? We would be orphans.  Who would we live with??? It was typically about this point my Dad’s snoring alerted me that he was still kicking, but the bigger and more important question was “Is Mom alive or dead?”  I would silently make my way over to her side of the bed and stand there staring at her, willing her to breathe.  I was petrified that she wouldn’t and the relief would flood over me when she would invariably open her eyes and say “What???  Go back to bed!!!!”

Thinking back on it from her perspective I can only imagine what these moments would have been like for her.  She is soundly asleep basking in a delightful dream when she senses a  presence boring holes into her.  She opens her eyes only to find a Child of the Corn standing there with a ratty tatty stuffed dog staring her down.  I’m impressed that she never once swore… I know that faced with a similar situation I most likely would have.

I don’t think my heart would have survived childhood without Puff.  He was my protector, my confident and my faithful companion.  He now resides in a closet high, high up away from the those that would destroy him in the name of play.

Years passed, I was finished school and I desperately wanted a dog of my own.   I started purchasing a very thick annual dog book that highlighted all the different breeds and listed breeders in the various provinces.   This book was like the Sears Wish Book but for dog lovers.  The hours I spent flipping through the pages imagining what it would be like to own a Shepherd, a Vizsla,  a Schnauzer or a Frenchie.  The possibilities were limitless and I was overwhelmed by the sheer amount of choices.  There was also the barrier of apartment living.  Both apartments that I rented post Uni did not allow dogs.  If they had, my first dog would have been a re-homed Weimaraner named Shadow who I fell in love with.  But fate knew she wasn’t meant for me… my heart dog still had not been born.

Jump forward six years.  I had purchased a home of my own, one that had been specifically chosen because it had a large yard and backed onto green space… absolutely perfect for a dog.  I was finally in the position to welcome a dog into my life, but I still couldn’t decide on which breed would be perfect for me.  I was strongly leaning toward a German Shepherd and it seemed like it was meant to be when I found out the Relator who sold me my house was a Shepherd breeder.  Alas,  all the hidden costs of purchasing the house wiped out my reserves and I wasn’t in a position to financially commit to dog ownership.  

As I rebuilt my nest egg I continued to fall in and out of love with different dog breeds.  I loved the quirky personalities and small size of the Coton du Tulear, the exuberance of Lab/Shepherd mixes and the ears and faces of Frenchies.  If I only I could have one of each.  

Years went by, but for some reason now that I could welcome a dog into my life I was hesitating.  I found one excuse after another and instead found myself getting my dog fix by hanging out with friends dogs, dog sitting for others and loving up the dogs of the hood.  

2005 introduced the catalysts that inspired me to make 2005 the Year of the Dog.  Work had been insanely busy and the demands for working longer and longer hours were increasing exponentially.  I was starting to become bitter as co-workers who had children could say “I have to get home to my children, I can’t stay!”  As they were finishing this sentence their heads would turn and look at me.  Everyone knew I was single and did not have kids… no built in reason to leave… Here you go… take care of this before you leave please.  

If it only happened every now and then it wouldn’t have been a big deal, but it was happening at least weekly and sometimes multiple days in a row.  Something had to change, I needed a reason to leave work and I needed that reason fast.   Around this time,  I met two dogs that I fell head over heels in love with… Manchester and Niijii.   Both were calm and well mannered Golden Retrievers who instantly made me think of Puff.  So fluffy… so golden… so everything that I wanted in a dog.  

In my initial dog research I had quickly crossed Golden’s off my list, as most Golden’s that I had met were hyper and uncontrollable…. Totally not what I was looking for.  Well Manchester and Niijii changed my opinion instantaneously.  I found out both were from the same breeder and quickly phoned GoldenPride Kennels to find out more about their dogs and how to get my name on a wait list for a litter.  It turned out that there was a litter of six weeks old and there was one left.  If I was interested I needed to decide quick, as there was another person also interested and they were going to drop off their deposit the next day. 

Be damned with the snow squall that was going on, I hung-up the phone, jumped in the truck and drove out to the farm to meet the litter.  That moment is what started it all.  I was sold and put down a deposit to hold my spot.  A few short weeks later I had my Gimli!  

In case you are wondering “I can’t stay… I have to let out the puppy!!!” Was an even stronger reason to be able to leaver on time than “I have to get home to the take care of my kids.”  Now I was allowed to go and my co-workers found sitters.  

It wasn’t all sunshine, rainbows and unicorns though.  I spent the next two and a half years questioning the sanity of my decision and continually commenting “It is dang lucky you are cute!!!”.  Let’s just say that Gimli was the opposite end of the spectrum from Manchester and Niijii.  Cuter than hell, but man did he put me through my paces in those first three years.  There were many times when I was ready to call it quits, but I stuck with the training (both him and me) and eventually we got to a place where we found mutual love and the ability to agree to disagree.  

As Gimli approached 8 years, I started to panic.  Eight years seems to be the arbitrary number that all the neighbourhood Goldens lived until.  One day they were there and the next everyone was filled with sorrow, as another Golden buddy crossed the Rainbow Bridge.  I may have spent the first three years questioning why I got him, but we were at a point where I could not bear the thought of not having him in my life.  I constantly had Brene Brown moments with him i.e. He would do something that made me laugh, or I would look at him and my heart would swell 10 times it size but the very next thought would be “He is going to die… I am going to be all alone again!” (Enter crying of epic proportions). 

I started contemplating getting another one, but every time I did, I couldn’t help but think of the first three years and I hesitated. Did I have it in me to go through puppyhood again????  I didn’t think I could go back to the rips in the legs and ass of pants, the endless troubles with toilet training, not to mention being used as one big chew toy, not to mention the vet bills related to eating things that no dog should eat.  

I talked my fears through with the owner of GoldenPride and asked about possibly purchasing a retiring Mom.  She was open to the idea but all the retiring Mom’s were spoken for, for the next few years.  

And so the wait began…

As Gimli approached 10 years,  I knew it was now or never, we were living on bonus years as it was.   I still remember the odd mixture of excitement, nerves and dread that I had when submitted my deposit for another male puppy.  Ferg entered our lives in 2015 and it was the best decision I ever made.  Puppyhood with Ferg was way different than with Gimli.  Ferg was an easier dog and besides he directed his puppy acupuncture toward Gimli… pay back is a bitch!  How to you like those sharp puppy teeth Gimli… he he!

Jen, the breeder, was worried for me and kept asking if I was happy with my decision to get a puppy vs a retiring Mom.  My response “100%!!! Had Ferg been my first dog I would have a sea of dogs at my place!!!”  Well those words seem to have come back to haunt me.

After Gimli passed at 13.5 years I wanted to get another friend for Ferg.  I put down another deposit for a puppy and the wait started again.  As it turned out Jen was looking for a foster for one of the Mom’s.  Hmmmm.  My brain had been gearing up for another boy, but she was available right away.  I agreed to a trial and it did not take long before I was sold on Whisper becoming a member of the herd.

Photo Credit: Bushwacker Photography

The house felt empty when Whisper went back to the kennel to have her next litter of puppies.  As I lamented about the emptiness in the house Jen commented she had a Springer that she was looking to foster.  I instantaneously fell in love with Oakley.  Everything about him screamed take him home.  How could I live without seeing those freckles each day not to mention his “I love life” energy.  Ferg and Oakley instantly connected and my Dynamic Duo grew to the Terrific Trio.  

The next few months were the best of my life.  Sure I grumbled about having to fight for a spot in the bed, being on the bottom of the pile of dogs and about the property destruction but I revelled in the training, the unconditional love and observing each of of their different personalities.  I laughed a lot during that period. 

Then the unimaginable happened, Oaks and Ferg got into a serious fight with each other.  Oaks had decided that I was his resource to guard and took exception to Ferg sitting on the couch with me.  He launched himself at Ferg and sunk his teeth into Ferg’s head and eye area.  Ferg is usually a lover, but the pain of the bite flipped a switch in him and he was out for blood of his own.  I don’t know how I managed it, but I pried Oakley’s death grip off of Ferg’s head and then was able to hold them apart using their collars while I navigated the distance from the couch to the kennel.  Once Oaks was safely in his “house” I turned to Ferg fearing that Oaks had actually punctured his eye.  The bite marks were all around the eye but luckily missed the eyeball.   It was a trip to the emergency vet for us and once Ferg was patched up I had some decisions to make. 

After consulting the owner of Clever Canines, we developed a plan to work on Oakley’s resource guarding.  It was a long month of little sleep, as Oakley was demoted from sleeping with us and had to sleep in a kennel.  He had major separation anxiety and would scream, cry, bark all night long.  I averaged maybe two hours of sleep a night.  Not fun.  

At the end of the month I started reintroducing the boys to each other and things were going well, but I could not get over my nervousness that they could turn on each other in a blink of an eye.  After much agonizing soul searching I decided that I was not the best fit for Oakley and the process of finding him a new home began.  He landed in a soft place and I’d like to think the Oakley Bible I provided the family with helped ease his transition into his new home.  I was pleased to hear that in this new home his anxiety improved and he was thriving, but knowing this did not relieve the burden on my heart.  I mourned for what was and what could have been.  The amount of tears that I had shed from the moment post bite and in the months post rehoming could have filled Lake Erie.  I was a a mess.

Jen, in an attempt to help me over my heart break, suggested that I take Hazel, a Whisper daughter, home to train.  It proved to be a great distraction and I loved seeing Whisper continue to mother Hazel, as she grew.    A few months latter Jen was looking for some help with raising another “future Mom” and I agreed to foster Lyndy as well.  The duo that became a trio, which flipped back to a duo grew to the Fab Four within a three month period.

Hazel and Lyndy were only going to stay for training but I failed.  Training only did not take long to turn into this is their forever homes.   I can’t imagine life without Ferg and the Ladies and all the Golden Glitter that litters my floor, attaches to my couches and attacks my clothing.  Yes!!!! You read that right.  The hair attacks my clothing.  I can lint roll until the cows come home but somehow the dogs manage a surprise assault on my pants, in the seconds between putting down the roller and heading out the door.  I am slowly accepting that I and my floors will be perma-hairy from this day on forward.  It is what it will be!  A small price to pay for all the unconditional love and laughter. 

You would think that living with four large dogs would be overwhelming, especially given that two of them are only two months apart, so it was double the training and double the puppy “fun”.  But it hasn’t been.  Thankfully Gimli prepared me for this moment.  Nothing they have done could compare to what he put me through….  well except for Lyndy…. she also seems to enjoy eating things dogs should not eat. 

It is because things have been so even keel that I still find myself lusting after other dogs and periodically thinking about adding to the herd.  What about an Australian Cattle Dog????? Ferg really wants a Frenchie of his own… can I deny him this one small request???

Over the last year I have dog sat a couple of other Golden’s Hudson and his sister Addy.  I will say I fell in love with Huddy.  He is a big goof, so mild manner and very very floofy!  I would have said yes to his staying but for two things.  As large as a Ford 150 Super Cab is, it is very squishy with five dogs and one human in it and Hudson is two months younger than Lyndy which would mean I have three all around the same age.  Not so bad now, but at end of life I would be in for mega hurt… both heart and wallet.   

Addy is one of the new “future Mom’s” and she is a delight but her love of cords and inquisitive mind had me having to up my “A” game.  She reminds me of Lyndy and one hijinx loving dog in a house is enough for me.  I was feeling pretty proud of myself for sticking with the plan of sitting and not keeping.  See there is proof that I don’t need to have all the Goldens in the world living at my house… even if that is my secret not so secret dream. 

I was at the kennel the other day, admiring the newest litter of puppies, I swear Jen needs to put up a streaming camera… I could watch puppies sleep , play, etc for hours on end.   While watching Mommy Paris feed the twins (yes actual twins) we started talking about the current“future Mom’s” and options for training, etc.  I commented that I would be open to one of them coming to stay at my house for training as I from personal experience how hard it is to train two similar aged puppies at the same time.   We talked about who and I was leaning toward it being Brie because not only is she family (Whisper is her Mother, Hazel and Lyndy half sisters and Ferg’s her Uncle) but  I have my fingers crossed that Addy will be going to one of the other foster homes in the near future.  

Well, in less than 24 hours, talk became action and that is why I now have five Golden Nuggets residing at my house.  I keep telling myself that Brie is only here for “training”.  Only time will tell if I fail at “training only” a second time and if the Fab Four turns into the Fantastic Five!

How will you know?  I will see me at the wheel of one of these bad boys with a Golden in every window.