In Honor of Shark Week.

I am breaking my own rules.  I said I was not going to blog today. Instead I would concentrate on finishing house work and catching up on my LEAN course work.  But an opportunity presented itself and I had to write it down while it was fresh in my mind and my a$$.

On Friday I decided to take the dogs, all 120 pounds of them, for a walk.  Fergus was being an a$$, oops I mean a puppy.  There were many corrections and ++ sighs of discontent on my behalf.  We were two blocks from home when we encountered a grizzled cigar smoking dude.  Fergus did what Fergus does... he made a B-line for the dude.  The dude looked panicked.  I grabbed Fergus and sat him down in the grass to the far right of the man, in an attempt to give the man ample room to pass the whirling dervish of fur and excitement.

Did the dude walk on by?????

A GRAND BLEEPING NOPE!

I don't know what Dude was thinking or doing, as my back was to him, but whatever he did made Gimli decide that he had to say hello.  I felt one the leashes pulling me back.  I stepped to pull Gimli in, while maintaining a hand hold on Fergus.  Fergus saw an opportunity to make a break for it and he set off like he had a rocket in his pants.  I remember a leash tangling around my leg, my slow listing to the right and then my right knee striking the pavement followed by a slow and incremental slide along the pavement.

Picture from www.pinterest.com

To say I was miffed would be an understatement.  Rage fuelled by embarrassment bubbled in my belly.  Counting to 10 was not working.  Breathing... well lets just say the exhale scorched a path 100 feet wide in front of me.  I managed to control my emotions and make it home where I put some distance between the dogs and myself.  That is when I vowed that Fergus's puppyhood was over.  Intense training would start the next day.

As of Saturday morning Fergus must work for his food.  There are no freebies.  The plan is working.

As of this morning he has mastered-

• Come- almost too well, as he does not stop until he reaches me.  50 feet recalls have become a game of chicken.... I am usually the one to move out of the way, as 50 lbs moving at a fair clip packs a wallop when it hits you; not enough to send me catapulting through the air, but enough to make me fear for my safety.  
• Sit
• Sit and stay for 12 seconds at a 6 foot distance
• Heel- about 60% of the time
• Leave it
• Stand-  about 40% of the time

Editor's proviso:  The above is true as long as there are no dogs and people around.  If these elements enter into the equation the stats drop dramatically.  

It is amazing what a motivator food can be.  Thank goodness he overcame his picky eating syndrome.

This morning we headed out into the sunshine, to complete Fergus's training walk around the sniffy block.  I decided it would be fun to run the last .25 km home.  

Picture it......  It was like the opening scene for Baywatch- but with way more coverage and way, way more wobbly bits.

Fergus was confused-  Why are we running?  Why is she not stopping?  Why am I soooooooooo exciiiiiiiteddddd?

The only logical conclusion- we are under attack....... 

We are UNDER ATTACK..... 

                           

                           WE ARE UNDER ATTACK!!!!!!!!!!....... 

                            of course this got shortened into just plain ATTACK!!!!!!!!!! in his dog brain.

That is when his prey drive kicked in and he leaped up and bite me in my right butt cheek.  Not hard enough to puncture my pants or my skin but enough for me to say..... "AAACKK!!!!!!!  That's my butt!"

My story-  

I stopped and turned.  There was Fergus looking around  trying to see if he could pin the deed on someone else.  But he was the only one around.  Obviously the culprit.  

Fergus's story-  

"We were set upon by a Ninja land shark.  You obviously sensed it.... that is why you started running.  The shark sailed by me and launched itself at you, biting your buttocks.  I fended it off and scared it away.  It moved so fast you didn't see it."

Whew! 

"That was close, that shark would have taken your leg off if I didn't save you!"

"Your welcome!!!!"

"Now lets discuss my reward.... Lets say another bowl of food?  Maybe a handful of the good treats? Huh...... Huh??????????

Photo from "Wheredosharkslive.com".... on land obviously!!!!

The morale of this story....... Exercise caution when there are Ninja Land Sharks on the loose.