Confessions of a Snootie McSnooterton

It is a rare occasion that I get up early in the morning to work-out.  I have grandiose plans when I go to bed-

"I'll get up early..... I'll go for a run or jump on the elliptical..... the birds will be tweeting, unicorns will prance on by, angels will be getting wings left, right and sideways."

I am so pumped with my early morning work-out  plans that I often have a hard time falling asleep.  I am like a child waiting for Santa to come on Christmas Eve.

SUPER JACKED-UP!

But then something mysterious happens in the middle of the night-  someone or something steals my workout mojo. By the time the alarm goes off, at some ungodly hour, I am a mere shell of the person that set the alarm the night before.  A shell filled with crustiness and malcontent.  The very last thing that I want to do is to crawl out from my protective bubble under the warm covers to
"workout".  Really what was I thinking...... up before the birds..... moving and lifting things.... Ackkkkkk!

I think NOT!!!!!!!

More times than not I wake in the middle of the night, well before the alarm is set to go off.  I look at the clock and softly chuckle - "You are deluded.... really working out in the morning.... face the facts sweet pea- you like to sleep!"  That is when I reach over, change the alarm to a more reasonable wake-up time, sigh with content and fall back into a blissful sleep.  (I strongly recommend a two alarm- alarm clock.... saves fiddling with resetting it.  This change has been a life saver for me.) 

On the rare occasion that I do make it out of bed in the morning I am overcome by a wave of snootiness and pride...... "If only others had as much resolve as I do, we could all be working out together."

"Not everyone has my stamina!"

"There really should be a ticker-tape parade lined-up outside my bedroom door right now.... it is time to celebrate my accomplishments!!!!!!!"

I am high 5ing myself with each step that brings me closer to the work-out.  You got out of bed-  high 5!  Your dressed-  high 10!!!!!!  Your walking out the door...... whoo hooo there is no stopping you now!!!!!!!!

As I run by houses with pitch black windows I can't help but feel slightly superior.  I really try not to, but it bubbles up from my toes and froths out of my heart and head-   "I am up and at it..... while those lazy bones are still sleeping.  What a pity for them.... they don't know what they are missing!" An anthem runs through my head with each step that takes me farther from my bed.

 "I AM AWESOME...... TRULY AWESOME!!!!"

Fortunately my inner Snoot has a short shelf life and flames out after a day or two.  I then blissfully return to the land of sleep longer.... workout later and all is right with the world!