The Garburators of the Dog World

If they ever had a show called "Weird Stuff Dog's Eat"  guaranteed there would be at least one

Notice the "texturizing" in the bottom left corner?

Golden on the show each week.  See Golden's like to eat.  It doesn't matter if it is edible, non-edible, poisonous even..... Golden's say "Bring it on !!!!  Do you have any sauce for this.... ahh don't worry 'bout it.  I got it covered."

If they are not eating, it's time to worry, as there is something horribly wrong.

Don't believe me?

A close-up of the dog's attempt at Braille

Well maybe this will convince you.  It is a list of all the non-edible things that the Golden's in the 'hood have ate over the years. Yes, Golden owners do stand around and compare.  It makes us feel better to know that others share our anxiety about possible bowel obstructions:

• A hair brush (requiring emergency surgery to remove)
• A newly installed MDF baseboard (not a chunk; the whole thing)
• A razor blade (Golden's are dare devil's)
• An electrical cord (that was plugged in... see total dare devils)
• Unmentionables
• Poo.... yep that poo!  Some Golden's are not discerning in their culinary tastes.  In fact one of mine experimented with pre-packing his poo by eating a poo-bag..... it was a fail but made me do a double take.  
• A baked potato covered in tin foil.
• A bar of soap
• A bag of magnets (that makes for a sparkly X-ray and colourful pooh for the following few days after)
• A countless number of socks and hosiery
• Compost... rotting grass and banana peels seems to be the new delicacy in the neighbourhood.
• A twinkle light (because it crunches)
• Bills-  If only this resulted in not having to pay them.  Sadly it doesn't.
• Mushrooms and various other assorted fungi (poisonous or not)
• Don't get me started on the sticks and other wood like products e.g. pine cones, etc.

Truth be told everything below poo is my Golden's contribution to the list.  It's like they know I am competitive and want to make sure that I can always one-up the ridiculousness of other Golden's we meet.  

Fun fact-  Should you need to induce vomiting in your dog, here is the recommended dosing as per "Golden Retriever's for Dummies":

•  Hydrogen peroxide 10 ml orally  every 15 minutes until they throw up.  

A local vet recommended only going as high as three doses.  Over the last nine years I have found that three is the magic number.  Be prepared for a world of frothy fun!

Being used to Gimli and his insatiable appetite I initially thought I had a defective Golden.  Fergus

I won't eat!  You can't make me

was ho-hum about his food.  He would eat a few kibble, walk around, maybe go back for more, maybe go check out something more interesting.  This was so country to all that I know about Golden's I was perplexed.

Fergus was so slow at eating I had to resort to guarding Fergus's food as Gimli would finish his bowl and then head to Fergus's for a post meal nosh.    I tell you when it comes to food, Gimli is a pro at finding a way to get it.  Luckily my Ninja stealth won.... most days.... okay probably more a 60:40 split with Gimli being the leader.  He distracted me gosh durn it.  

It got so bad I had to resort to spiking Fergus's food with frozen blueberries, a fan favourite in my house.  It worked for a bit but then he would be distracted by something shiny, a new smell....  H E double hockey sticks even  fluff.   I was worried that there was something wrong with him, but the vet assured me there wasn't.   Over the next two weeks the chore of getting food into Fergus became a full time obsession.  I kennelled him with food with the hope he would finish his food when I was gone... he didn't.   When he wasn't kennelled I was guarding his food while coaxing him to eat-  "Come on just one more bite.  You know there are starving dogs in third world countries".  No go!

I even resorted to hand feeding, trying to trick him into thinking the food was treats.  When that did not work I mixed treats in with his food.  He was smarter that I and eat the treats leaving his food in the bowl.  I knew that there would be challenges with adding a puppy to my life but I definitely did not think a non-eating Golden would be one of them.

I developed a new respect for every parent who has a picky or resistant eater in their life.

PAIN STAKING!!!!!!!  Such an understatement.  

No food.... No love for you!!!!

I put my knowledge of child resistant eaters to work, to try and figure out what was contributing to Fergus's eating challenges.  I removed distractions (hard to do when every sound movement, etc alerted the ADHD centres of his brain).   I tracked when he was more likely to eat- he had no problem trying to "steal" Gimli or the cat food and could eat both with amazing haste.  Crunchy textures and larger bit sizes were a deterrent to eating.

The conclusion-  the issue was the food itself.

A trip to the pet store and the purchase of new food.  Viola! Fergus was eating.  Not as fast as Gimli, but definitely faster than the previous week.  

Problem solved!

Now Fergus is a gobbling machine.  He cleans his bowl and hastens over the Gimli's to see if he can "borrow" a few pieces from his.  Whew!

Speaking of eating I am getting sad eyes from Gimli and Fergus is trying to eat the wooden block that is levelling the desk.  I think that is my cue to get going!

My belly is full!!!!!!  HAPPY, HAPPY, HAPPY!