To pay for University I secured a summer job at the local institution working nights. The main job duties on night shift were to make sure the residents were clean, comfortable, accounted for and kept alive. One night to my dismay I fulfilled all but one of those duties. I was working with a woman who was heavily pregnant with triplets. We were doing our scheduled bed check/resident repositioning when I found one of the residents with a mottled blue and red face. I checked for a pulse as I was taught in swimming class. I was sure I felt one but could not be 100% sure that it was his pulse and not mine. Heart was hammering in my chest and I had a strong urge to run..... run fast. My co-worker went to call the nurse on call and I started CPR. I still remember the sound his chest made as the air entered his lungs. It made the hair stand-up on the back of my neck and on my arms. My stomach decided to join the parade, flipping and a flopping. I started gaging in time to the rhythm my stomach was churning out. I did chest compressions while trying to talk my supper into staying in my belly.
It is hard to breathe out and keep vomit in. I would not recommend it to anyone. It felt like an eternity until the night nurse arrived and helped me transport the resident up to the Hospital wing. I remember the first question that the Doctor asked- " What time did I find him". By this point I was hysterical and did not have the ability to tamper down my sarcasm.... "What time was it?????" "I'm sorry but my first thought was not to find a clock it was to try and save this person's life!!!!!" Then I broke down into the ugliest of ugly crying. If they wanted to get any information from me, they soon realized that would not be possible. I leaned into the wall and slid to the floor. Everything was tears and snot and guttural sounds mixed with moans that were interspersed with hyperventilation. At some point I was sent back to the ward to finish my shift after which I went home to cry and wash the stench of death off of my body. I don't recall sleeping much that day. That night I returned to ward where it happened. It hurt to walk in the room and see the empty bed. The What if game had started in my head the night before I could not turn it off. What if we had started at Resident X's end of the hall for our checks... could we have saved him? What if I did not do CPR correctly? What if.... what if.... what if???????
That night I was working with Barry. Barry registered high on the heebee geebee factor and was a self-proclaimed ball-buster. He had heard about what had happened and delighted in tormenting me all night long. When the PA system would crackle he would say "Max it is Resident X calling you from the grave.... he is saying "Why couldn't you save me? Why did you let me die". He put the fear of biological contamination in me..... "What? You didn't use barrier protection? Do you know what type of diseases you could have exposed yourself to? I bet you now have Hepatitis or Aids or God knows what. I'd go get tested if I was you." He did not stop there. He relished in telling me about a summer relief worker who had had a resident die on their shift. A coroner's inquest was done and they found the summer student negligent. That student was expelled from University, was eventually found guilty of criminal negligence and was sent to jail. Once they were released from prison they could find a job because of their record.
It was a long painful two nights working with Barry. Crushed by guilt that I could not save Resident X. Worried about my health. Scared I might never have a career. Worried I would go to jail. Let's not forget that I could not sleep. Every time I closed my eyes I would see Resident X's face and hear the rattle in his chest.
On the fourth night I worked with Lorrie, who was a fun loving no nonsense type of woman. She made it her mission to cheer me up and when we were putting away laundry she donned one of the new rain capes that had arrived on the ward. She danced around all that while saying "Barry, I am Resident X's ghost and I have come to claim your soul..... Boo!" I burst out laughing at the absurdity of it all. Then I followed suit donning the white rain cape with little planes on it and tried out a ghost impression of my own. The giggles had hit and we could not stop laughing while we put away the rest of the laundry. That was what I needed and it was the night the seed of revenge was planted. I spent my free time that shift working out a plan of attack. I knew that in a few days I would be working with Barry again. I also knew Barry liked to go for walks on his break and when he came back from those walks he liked to have a constitutional. By the time I finished my shift I had a solid revenge plan and I felt infinitely lighter and carefree.
The next shift I worked with Barry I made sure to wear all black. Black was needed to make my arms and legs fade into the murky grey of the night lit hall. When Barry left for his walk I quickly did my rounds, took off my shoes (to minimize noise) donned the white cape with the little airplanes and hid in the room closest to the washroom. Barry came back to the ward and started walking down the hall to the washroom. I slipped in behind him as he passed by and followed less than two steps behind him. He put his keys in the door lock and that is when I jingled my keys behind him close to his ear. He paused ,he felt his belt for his keys and I jingled mine again. He slowly turned around saw the white flash of the cape, I let out a ghoulish "oooooohhhhhhh" he jumped and started running on the spot.
I burst out laughing. I am sure he wanted to punch me but the call of nature that forced him to cut his walk short was even stronger now that his Adrenalin was flowing. He scurried into the washroom and I went to check on the residents.
This second part, was not part of the plan but I capitalized on the opportunity. Barry must have got it into his head that I was going to hide and try and scare him again. He came out of the washroom and started his long walk down to the nursing station. At each door he would stop and slowly look to the right and then the left while saying "Where are you hiiiiiiiiding????? I'mmmmmmmm goinnnnnng to find youuuuuuuuu!" I walked up the hall behind him amused by his antics. By this time I had my shoes back on and wasn't even trying to be quiet. It was after the third door that I responded to his now patent call...... "I'm right behind youuuuuuuu!" He jumped and turned around. The colour had drained from his face and quite frankly my night was made.
I could have left it there but somehow our business together did not feel resolved. I got my taste of revenge and the power rush of holding someone's emotions in the palm of my hand and I double dog loved that feeling. I wanted more.
Phase 2 was born
I figured Barry would be expecting me to pull another prank soon. I could have... but where would the fun be in that. I let him stew. He was nervous and on edge but I did nothing. I waited for him to feel safe again and then unleashed the grandest of grand pranks that would live on in infamy at the institution.
While I patiently waited I let Barry have his little fun with his ghost stories and comments about Resident X. I just smiled and plotted and plotted and plotted.
For Phase 2 I enlisted the help of one of my best friends, Moojio, who was working in the same building and Lorrie. Together we checked the schedules and waited until the rotation that had us all working on the correct wards. I was working with Lorrie and Moojio was working on the ward above us. Barry was working on the Ward at the far end of the building. From the recon I had conducted over the previous months I knew the route Barry consistently walked when working on the ward he was on. Moojio called down to Barry's ward at break time to ask a question like "Hey do you guys have any extra soaker pads?". Really she was scoping out which break Barry was taking. She called me with the information and I got ready. I don an all black camouflage over my work clothes, put on the balaclava and gloves that I borrowed from one of the residents locker. I headed out the door with the stuffed badger pelt, I had brought from home and some fishing line. I tied the fishing line to the pelt and placed it so that it would be close to the path Barry would be taking. I retreated into the undergrowth of the shrubbery at the front of the building and waited. Lorrie and Moojio watched from the windows of the wards they were working on. According to them Barry walked up to the pelt. He stopped, put his hands on his hips and looked at pelt with a puzzled expression. Assuming it was nothing he started walking away. His ankle hit the fishing line as I pulled it. This caused the pelt to scurry on the ground toward him. The ladies said when that happened he started running fast in the opposite direction. A few 100 yards later he stopped and started yelling- "I know it is you! I'm going to find you and make you pay!" I will admit I feared a little for my safety at that point. Barry continued on his walk around the building. I waited a few seconds, sprinted to and picked up the pelt and then started the mad dash to the ward. I had to get to the ward and get rid of the "evidence" in case he headed there first. Moojio met me in the stairway to take my camouflage and the pelt and headed back to her ward. I took a few deep breathes to steady my nerves and prepared for the inquisition. It did not take long for the phone to ring. Barry grilled me. I played it nonchalant and surprised. Lorrie acted as my alibi. A few questions in I could hear Barry loosing his conviction, wavering in his original certainty it was me. He asked around and by this time more permanent staff were in on it and backed my version. The next night I followed up with a call to Barry's ward saying how scared and paranoid I was walking to work that night..... what with a wayward prankster on the loose. That did it. Barry now was on high alert. Later that night he came to coffee- he was flushed, out of breath and soaking from the waist down. He had been on his nightly walk around the grounds and came upon a person in a trench coat walking the grounds as well. That struck Barry as odd. Could this be the prankster? He gave chase to the trenched figure and chased them out into the culverts on the edge of the property. He lost them in the weeds. We all sat there stunned and tried to figure out who the trenched figure could be. No one let Barry know that he was chasing the wrong person. It seems everyone was tired of Barry's years of pranking and they all felt this was the Waterloo that would cure him of his need to "gotcha", which it did.
A few years later working in another building at the institution some of the staff were talking about weird things that happen when working nights. One of the supervisors told a tale about a time she as walking between the cottages and she was chased by a random person who she thought was a trespasser or an escaped resident from a locked ward. She ran to one of the cottages for safety. I had found the mysterious trenched person. I apologized for my part in her duress. Everyone around the table sounded in chorus..... "You were the one with the pelt? People still talk about that prank."
That's me! Have a pelt and will prank if pushed, so consider yourself forewarned.
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